Thursday, March 12, 2009

The good news: Profits are unchanged

It's tax time here at the Warehouse, so we've been busy pulling together records for the accountant. Basically, it looks like gross income will again be zero for the year, resulting in a net income of, let's see ... also zero. We do have another year of depreciation on the coffee maker and the Herman Miller Aeron chair we bought in more prosperous times, but we suppose the lack of income renders that moot.

Readership remains at about 30 hits a day, although closer analysis reveals 20 of those hits to be ourselves, checking to see if there are any comments. Comments, which we've been accepting in lieu of cash, have declined slightly from minimal to statistically insignificant. But that's probably because we're no longer juicing the numbers by replying to our own posts. So it is the opinion of the board that the Warehouse is weathering the economic meltdown pretty well.

Our Twitter initiative has not performed to expectations, producing even fewer comments than the blog. Our smart, amusing updates are frequently garbled due to the tiny iPod Touch keyboard, and so far have been universally ignored. The board has often wondered if the damned thing is even working.

Going forward, the board is considering a number of strategies. Most of them involve shutting down the blog and seeking employment with the lawn-maintenance crew we've noticed working across the street. We've also considered posting pictures of nude celebrities, but can't find any. The other option -- timely, insightful analysis on a topic people actually care about -- yeah, right. We'll get right on that.


Brian and Trish said...

I am a daily follower of your blog. This is my first comment. Come to Panama! Life is good, the cost is cheap and WE'RE here. What more could you want? We're weathering (so to speak) the recession well.


Dave Knadler said...

Soon as I can find a way to embezzle a large sum of money, I'll be right down. (I know it's relatively inexpensive down there, but I'd want to lord it over the other ex-pats.)

Ryan said...

I really enjoyed reading this. Thanks!

Oh here's your payment via comment.

Linda J said...

Awww, don't shut down the blog. I read it faithfully!

Anonymous said...

Dave - Keep on keepin' on. Two old hands on the copy desk read you faithfully.

K2 in Missoula
Yes, still working at the 'Zoo.

Anonymous said...

I can't say I read faithfully, but I check in now and then to see if you have a new story coming out. Glad to hear that your latest will be in EQMM soon, as I'm a subscriber.

I was going to ask about your novel until I saw the update in your author blurb. Don't know if it helps or hurts, but I'm still looking forward to it, whenever it's ready.

John H.
Northridge, CA

pundy said...

I enjoy this blog too. Good, honest, self-deprecating, modest. And funny too. Pretty admirable, and a lot harder than it looks.

Reading it is good for the soul. Thanks.

Jessie K said...

Ha ha ha ha ha! You funny, dad!

Jessie K said...

Can I excerpt this post on my blog, and, um, say I wrote it?

Jessie K said...

Oh, and Jake wants me to tell you he thinks coffee makers are holding their value. Especially if its Krups.